The End of a Relationship

For years now I have been in a close relationship that recently had to end.  It was time.  We both knew it.

This friend and I had been virtually inseparable, and although it feels odd to say it, I spent more time with this friend than with my wife.  (She knew about it and because of her equanimity and self-confidence, was accepting of it.)

There is no denying the strength of our bond; for years my friend was part of my highest highs and my lowest lows; I can’t imagine having gone through either of those extremes without the comfort of this relationship.

When the relationship began, it’s fair to say there was an initial period of infatuation bordering on romance.  Then came a happy plateau when the relationship came to full bloom, and with it, a comfort level and ease that are hallmarks of an integrated relationship.

But, for a couple of years now, it has been evident that the friendship had run its course.  Family members and colleagues (rightfully) pointed out that the relationship had become –not toxic, exactly–but borderline dysfunctional.  Time and and soul-searching brought me to the same conclusion.

So, this past weekend, I ended it.  There were no harsh words or an ugly scene–just a silent parting of the ways.  So clear were the signals that it must have come as no surprise.  Even so, I am still wistful when I look at a picture of a friend who for so long was so true.

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  • Marlene Davis

    Awwww. Phil, you say “we both knew it”…guess it was a “smart” phone.

  • Andrea Wiley

    Ah but Phil there might come a time in the near future when you wish that friend was by your side because the nice big numbers were so easy to push and because it folded on itself you didn’t have to worry about the screen getting scratched. Then there is the cool factor that it resembled a Star Trek communicator. Don’t tell me you abandoned all of that for the allure of Siri?!

  • John Hagstrom

    Probably flipped out when it finally got your number…but after phoning it in for years, the busy signal can be deafening. Can you hear me now?

  • Jose Juan Quevedo-Martinez

    Haha! Classic! I thought you were taking about an actual person!